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Can we have Pizza?

Yesterday’s blog I mentioned that I was a better father then mother or cook.  It is said a wise man knows his limits, and cooking is mine.

If my other post about ‘Heart Healthy Fried Chicken’ had failed to convince you why I am rightly banned from the kitchen, then the story of my Daddy surprise lasagna will.

It was a while ago my Children and I were alone, and I was trying to build a business and do the full-time father/mother thing.  One night I asked them my normal daily question “What kind of pizza do you want?” and I was shocked when they both said “can we have something else?”

How often do you have to order pizza before your children become tired of it?  After a quick confirmation that none of the five pizza chains we order from sounded good (omen number 1 if you can dial five different pizza chains by memory and the person that answers knows your name, your ordering too much Pizza) it was decided that they wanted lasagna

So a quick internet search later I had a recipe. Granted I had none of the ingredients, but I had a recipe and knew how to improvise.

So for the sauce not having garlic powder, I used Garlic salt (close enough). Basil looks like Oregano, catsup is made out of tomatoes,  Onion salt can be used instead of onion powder, and a little corn starch will thicken it right up – Sauce is covered

For sausage, it was even simpler. I raided the 6 pizzas still in the fridge (omen number 2 your ordering too much pizza, having a fridge full of pizza’s in various stages of decay) and removed all the Italian sausage I could, then mixed it with chopped Salami and Bologna (both of which are sausages!!) and now we have meat!

To cover the cheese deficit, I took all the cheese off the pizzas, removed the moldy bits from the bags of “yellow” cheese and figured Parisian is sort of like Ricotta.

I did have a package of noodles believe it or not, but I should mention that they had been there from before my wife left almost 2 years prior, and as it turns out, Noodles have expiration dates [who knew]

Mixed all the ingredients like the picture, and put in the oven at 400 for thirty minutes (for those of you baking along at home, cook who ever long you want at whatever temperature, the results will be the same.)

I brought down 2 plates of food for the kids, and proudly served them.  Before they started I got a phone call and went back to my office to talk for about 10 minutes.

When I returned, the plates were both on the floor. Both kids took a bite (which they spit up on the plates) and put it down in hopes that our dog would eat the food and they wouldn’t have too.

Their plan was flawed, the dog came up, took a sniff/lick and by the time I returned to the room, had his face buried in the cat box eating anything he could find there.

And I remember both kids looking at me and saying “Can we have Pizza?”

About rbdavis5

I'm me. If I ever find myself I will either update you or call the authorities (depending of how much of a reward there is)

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