Good morning my fellow frozen miscreants. Today while my city finds itself under a white blanket, I find myself disappointed.
I had been invited to go Skeet shooting but can’t because of the snow. Skeet shooting is something I really enjoy, even if it is a gentlemen’s sport. I know many of you have an image of someone at a strip club knocking back beers as being a gentlemen’s sport (or is that just me) but in truth Skeet shooting is the most gentlemanly sport there is.
My infallible proof of this point, the time I was shooting skeet. We shot in what are called Racks – 25 clay targets are thrown by a voice activated device in random direction. And your scored 1 point for each one you hit (if it breaks at all without hitting the ground) Normally I can hit about 18/25, (trouble with one that go fast right) but on this day, for reasons I don’t fully understand I was on fire. 15/15.
So after uttering the command “Pull” the system tossed me a slow straight target. It is one of the simplest shots. No pressure, no acquisition it almost flew out in front of my gun. You can imagine my anger when I missed.
So of course being a non-gentlemen I uttered an expletive that often is used to describe fecal matter. This word was close enough to ‘pull’ apparently that the machine fired another target. I yelled “No” and got yet another target. In anger I uttered “Fornicating Under the Consent of the King” (or at least a word spelled out from all of the capitalized letters) and a third target flew. In Frustration I kicked the machine drawing my 5th target and the end of my tantrum.
I ended up 21/25 for the set, one of my best racks but I was off the last shots.
Now when I go I shot like a gentleman.