The End of the Drought

Hey all,

as most of you have noticed ever since my job and I parted back in April, my humor and posts have grown farther and farther in between.

The conversion from Employee to Contractor to Day Time TV Aficionado has been hard on my humor,  and really ranting about the crap they try to put on during the day feels more pointless than normal.  I do admit some questions have come up, like do advertisers really pay to be on this crap they try to pass off before 5 PM daily?   Honestly I would rather watch the wacky way late night TV then the bull droppings they have during the day.  I once thought that the reason women stopped staying home and being home makers was because of a desire to better their families financial situation and/or a preference to be in the professional and working world earlier.  Now I just think it’s because day time TV sucks monkey nuts so hard that they’d rather have to juggle jobs and family then to sit through another TV Judge telling people who should never be allowed to bred ‘that’s not the way things work’

But I digress,  today I am one step closer to returning to the real working world.  This will have an effect on my writing (rather than having all the time to do it but no motivation, I will have all the motivation, but limited time which somehow improves my writing.  if I ever get Dragon Nat speaking for my computer, I will be even more prolific, but that’s problem # 673287 on the list of things…

so cross your fingers my fellow miscreants,  with luck I will be one again sharing the road every morning with an assortment of pin heads, stopping back at my Doughnut shops for my daily doses of contraband, and dealing with a bureaucracy that is mind numbingly stupid, all for a salary that lets me go break my toys and buy new ones…  all of which combine to get this blog back to its 4 times a week pattern!

we can only hope

Oh and BTW – anyone out there buy or read RAKASHA on Amazon yet ? if not – you should!! here is a link, just in case. http://www.amazon.com/Rakasha-ebook/dp/B00DPYKEAE/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1375299266&sr=8-1&keywords=rakasha

More Humor from the Universe

Greetings all,

The universe has a twisted sense of humor, I have always said that, and always will. Yesterday was one of those days that proved it to me. I will admit part of the joke is punishment for my own misbehaviors and for following patterns as opposed to dealing with real information.

A friend of mine is leaving the writers group & the city, as a result we had an impromptu going away party, where we all sat and drank and enjoyed her company for the last time.  By the end of the night, she was too drunk to let ride a bus home, so I drove her to the other side of town.  My reward for this act of selflessness, I didn’t get home until almost 2 am.   For those that don’t know, I have a contract job this week, which requires me to be out of bed at 5:30 am.

Fast forward a few hours later in the day, when my sleep deprivation hang over is at full tilt and most of my filters are off.  I get a call from a job recruiter reminding me I am 10 minutes late to my phone interview which I had forgotten about.   I dial in and have a brutal interview because my exhausted state. I try to funny, I get the techie bits right – but I also think that they are done with me and this opportunity is closing. Of course just to add insult to injury, about 5 minutes before the end of the interview my phone starts to ‘break up’ [the interviews words not mine] I know it’s because another recruiter is calling me.

After the interview – an email pops to my inbox, I take a quick look and the subject is EKMUU, a short story I submitted again (13th try). This can only mean one thing; the anthology that I submitted my story into has rejected it.

Before I can process that failure, my phone rings AGAIN! – it’s the first recruiter calling about the interview I just finished.  I apologize to her for my poor performance, and hope she will keep looking for me.

She laughed at me, turns out she was calling to tell me that the company was so impressed, they want a face to face meeting next week, and after I slip up and mention the other recruiter, they want the meeting on Monday!.

I grab my celebratory beer and as I take a sweet long pull, a thought in the back of my head starts catches my attention.  The email labeled Ekmuu – it has an attachment. Why ? What would be the point of sending me back my story ? The first thought “because they hate it so much they don’t want it on their server” is quickly replaced by the beer enhanced thought “there is NO scenario that they would send back the file”

Curious I go read the email –

EKMUU has been accepted by FEY Publishing for “Horrors of History” Anthology

I am not sure if the universe is punishing me for drinking with a sleep deprived state or rewarding me for not letting my friend ride the bus home drunk. Either way, plenty of good news.

Rant & Update

Hey all,

Sorry about being so lazy posting, but between trying to find work and trying to spur sales of my book (two things that are not really having any results) I have been busy as anything. I also have been doing freelance computer work and have 6 ‘realities’ that I was fighting, but have concluded I need to deal with. All of which combine to make me a very cranky miscreant.

Having typed all that, there was an article that crossed my path that I thought I would share – the worst possible idea I have ever heard, one that should it be implemented, could kill the eBook world quickly.

Let me start out by saying I sort of like eBooks – I still prefer hard copies of some books, most of the ones I read at least, but eBooks are cheap and some of them I have read, I have little desire to acquire the physical copy. Something about them never crossed that line. eBooks are a low-cost way to discover an author and not sit there thinking “I spend 10,15,20 for THIS?”

Today I read an article about how to make more money on your eBooks – by selling advertising within them. To me this idea strikes me as corrupt as pimping out your own children. I get the idea of ‘have a sponsor’ that could sort of work (not for me, I write fiction, but some of the other works I could see maybe having a sponsor.) but the very notion of “sell a few lines, like a classified” “Embed a promotional video” “Product placement can also be an effective tool” make me physically ill

I get that authors need to find new ways of making money,  the market is crowded, people are reading less, and spending less, but there are limits. while I don’t know where that line is, Advertising with in your book, whoring your story and your plot to include a brand of beer or soda is far over the line.  So far beyond that I don’t even think I can see the other side.

I can promise you this my fellow miscreants, the first eBook that I read that has a soda companies video embedded in it, or an egregious product placement will the last eBook I read. It’s bad enough how we get bombarded daily but that bullshit, I for one am not going to embed it into my books or my blog. I just hope that the rest of the world joins in on that thinking.

I would hate to see eBooks become the next Internet: IE somewhere that is so crowded by advertising and random links, and pop ups and such that the simple joy of reading is lost.

how did 7 days sneak by?

Hey all,

wow – 7 days since last post ? really – I blame the wife sized unit.  she left me home alone with no adult supervision.

while she has been gone, I have managed to score several interviews (and who knows maybe a job soon) I got more author work done and I scored a week-long contract.

of course I have been so busy with all of that, that my indoor water slide, filled with beer [because my state is under a sever drought at the moment, so I am going to do my part and save water]  has been put on hold 😦

guess I need to work on my priorities

oh and on an additional note I have discovered that if you mix Italian  au-jus in with your Cup of Noodles (because you had some au-jus left over) the result will make even the strongest stomach turn in a counter twisting motion.

I hope to spare any of you the error of trying this unholy concoction – the only good news is I doubt even the raccoon will even want it.

(and last thing, got a comment/message about Rakasha that made me laugh “I never accept oral satisfaction from flesh-eating demons” [Quote from the book – cleaned up a touch for you guys]  they reader said “thanks for the great advice.” )  not sure what to say to that one…

Interview with Robert Davis, Author and Miscreant extraordinaire.

another interview – I always enjoy when people not wearing uniforms or holding clipboards interview me! Thanks Kristen!

Kristen Hope Mazzola

I have had the pleasure of getting to know Robert through this very interesting and entertaining interview! I hope that you all enjoy his twisted sense of humor as much as I did!!! I have to say this was truly a fun one for me! 🙂

Snapshot_20130515

Do you write under any other names? No – But as many Robert Davis’ are are out I probably should, sadly Joe Kickazz is hard to remember so will have to stay with my real name.

What are you currently working on? I just published my first Novella ‘Rakasha: Legend of the Hindi Tiger Demon’  and I have about 12 more short stories, and 3 novels all in the works (as in ready to have ‘something’ done with them,  I am working on the fourth novel at the moment.

How many (if any) books do you have published and what are their titles? …

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Interviews of mine

Hello my fellow miscreants,

I completed 2 interviews, and before you ask no its was not with the local constabulary concerning any of the strange events from the holiday weekend (to which I deny any knowledge or involvement. nor will I tell you where my eyebrow is)

They were about me as an author (or writer, depending on where you set the bar exactly)

http://madeline40.blogspot.com/2013/07/robert-davis-about-writing-publishing.html?spref=fb

http://thomasafowler82.wordpress.com/2013/07/05/an-interview-with-robert-davis-author-of-rakasha/

they are somewhat more serious than normal but still I enjoyed the process.

thought y’all would find them fun.

Hope your Sunday is going, and sadly Monday is on its way…

BTW – for my fellow miscreants, a thought about my book. Mix my love of horror, my humor and toss in a few other elements, and you end up with a very good read. If you were one of the 51 people who downloaded it for free, be sure to leave a review of it – if your one that missed that boat, I will be launching another free day, but honestly at .99 cents it’s already a HUGE bargain.
http://www.amazon.com/Rakasha-ebook/dp/B00DPYKEAE/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1373182030&sr=8-1&keywords=rakasha

 

My Frist Free Day

Hello Fellow Miscreants, for those of you pooling your cash to save the .99 cents the book normally cost, now you can pick up a copy for free!

Follow my Attempt to Change to an Author

Hello all,

today I am doing my first free promotion day on Amazon.

http://www.amazon.com/Rakasha-ebook/dp/B00DPYKEAE/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1373038940&sr=8-2&keywords=rakasha

if you like horror, this is going to be one of your ‘Must read’ books.

Hope you all pick up a copy and if you like it, please leave a review!

thanks!!

Rakasha Ebook Cover

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You have the right not to read!

Hello Fellow miscreants,

As promised after a trip to the unemployment office, the pin head meter pegged at 11 before the needle broke.  I could spend days ranting about this, but the short version is because I missed a week of turning down the money, they reset a waiting period, but they also made an adjustment, the net result it, 2 to 4 weeks with no income before I start to collect my unemployment. (And yes I know last time it was 8 to 9 weeks, don’t ask me how this work, I gave up trying to figure that one out months ago)

I also have received no less than 2 hits about my writing.  My blog needs better editing, and is negative and snarky. And my Rakasha: Legend of the Tiger Demon book was “sick and disturbed, and I shouldn’t publish it.”

Too address these 2 points.   I promise to put 20% of my blog earnings into an editor, so that’s 20, carry the zero = Zero!!  I don’t make anything here, other than friends and soldiers in the miscreant army so this problem is solved.  as for being negative and snarky…. ahhh – anyone want to address that for me? I would think that with a title “Miscreant Thoughts and Lesser Things” you wouldn’t be looking for life affirming messages, but I guess the titles somehow missed the mark.  I do joke about my wife-sized unit a lot, not that I don’t care for her, respect her or what ever else, it’s that in small doses she is funny.  Besides she likes to walk under things like tree branches that knock me on my ass, she has done it enough times I am sure its part of her evil plan to shave 4 inch’s off the top of my head… but that’s another blog.

As for Rakasha, other than the fact I put an adult label on it, and put this disclaimer both on the sales site and in the book – 3rd page in fact.

WARNING – This is a collection of Horror stories. They are gory, gross, have drug and sexual references, mature situations and immature humor. If you are easily offended, this is not your book!

There is also the fact that the first reviewer said

This book is not for the faint of heart but if you enjoy a book filled with exotic adventure, humor and terrifying surprises, this is perfect for you. Rakasha doesn’t only have an addictive bite but an addictive story.

I supposed I could hire dwarves to pimp slap anyone that fails to pass the “do you have any nerves” test but not sure how I would pay them.

Just remember people, with the exceptions of the Constitution and at least some History books – you have the right NOT to read, please feel free to use it.

WTF – anthor break ? well no….

Hello Fellow Miscreants,

Anyone missing me ? I tend to post at least every other day but lately I have been lazy.  I would blame the heat, or sunspots or even consumption of my author juice but the sad truth is, now that I am fully unemployed, I don’t leave the house enough for anyone to annoy me. Not to the level of annoyance to be bloggable.

I do know my former consultant Nuked me on Facebook and is no longer talking to me, no clue why but honestly I can’t worry about things like that. Not blog worthy

I had a ‘rabid fan’ for a few days, until she started to tell me about how her daughter was in a hospital in Nigeria, and wanted to know if I could lend her some money.  Honestly not annoying enough to blog about.

I got a review from an early reader “I don’t like Horror and am strictly PG13, but your writing is solid”  [I gave them the disclaimer, now I have to wonder, what part of “Mature situations, Gore, Gross, Immature humor, Drug and sexual references” made it sound PG 13 ?  still not worthy of a blog…

Went and saw World War Z, and someone should talk about how writers should WRITE. The 2 plot holes were big enough not only to suck in this movie, but the next 2 they show on the screen. I would blog about this, but I already have on http://wp.me/p3a6cK-3Z

I published my first book, 6 days before I meant to – an interesting story, but that’s more for the writer’s blog then this one.http://www.amazon.com/Rakasha-ebook/dp/B00DPYKEAE/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372740916&sr=1-1

<sigh>

The good news for everyone, tomorrow I have a full day of running, and delivering a gift, and going to job services, and toss in a trip to the store, I am sure some outstanding member of humanity will ‘inspire me’