I wasn’t flashing you

Hello my fellow miscreants,

Once again I find myself using my blog to apologize for my own misbehaviors or misunderstandings. 

Today’s victim, I mean apology target is the little cute driving in the SUV – to this young woman I have to say I was NOT flashing you.

I can tell from your reaction (speeding up) that you must have mis-understood my intention. I swear you looked so scared, I noticed you even hung up your phone!

But, what you thought was flashing, was more blinking.  Of course both those terms are archaic, ‘Flashing’ would be what your great-grandmother called it,  ‘Blinking’ is perhaps what your parents called it, me I call it ‘using a turn signal’. 

Now I know I was in the right lane when I used my turn signal but I was not in fact going to take a left turn  from that position, I was going to enter your lane.

Clearly you were so afraid of the flashing/blinking/turn signaling that you gunned your engine, and closed the 1.5 car length between you and the car in front of you rather than have my .75 car length car enter that gap.  

While I do appreciate your hanging up your phone, I should point out that if you were trying to get away, your plan failed, being as you almost hit me during your panic run. I also should tell you had I been in my truck or jeep, I would have broad sided you stupid punk butt, pushed you into oncoming traffic and tore most of the impact zone off of that rolling pile of plastic and aluminum you call a car, and gleefully left you for dead. 

As it goes the only reason I laid into my horn was because it was too cold outside to roll down the window and give you the bird.

Of all the things you should do when you see that flasher/blinker/turn signal thing, ACCELERATE is the worse, slow down – maybe do nothing works too at those speeds.       

Back to my fellow miscreants, and on an unrelated note, does anyone know the legality of installing a mine dropper on your daily commuter vehicle? Just thinking out loud.

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